Five Things I Started Doing in 2015 That Changed My Life For the Better

I wouldn't say 2015 was a groundbreaking year for me. It was a good (and, in other ways, a hard) year, but it wasn't one of those where I look back and think, Wow, what a crazy ride. I can't believe all that happened. Has it not even been a year since ______?

However, even without any monumental changes, there have been a few things I started doing consistently that now, stepping back, I can see that, even though they're small, they've blessed my life in a significant way. And let that be a lesson to me: small steps, consistently taken, sometimes have a bigger long-term impact than world-rocking ones (and, if I'm being honest, I actually prefer those types of changes as opposed to the ones that leave me reeling).

 
Listening to a Conference Talk Every Morning
Every April and October, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (of which I am a member) holds, what's known as, General Conference. Lasting for two days, it consists of four general sessions filled with dozens of talks from leaders in the Church. Those are some of my favorite days of the year. They're a time for me to be filled up spiritually, and I always come away with a stronger testimony and sense of purpose.

Around the time of last April's conference, I was trying to figure out how to give more priority to my spiritual life. I was reading my scriptures every day but usually that was happening at night and sometimes I could only get a few verses in before I fell asleep. I knew I really needed something at the beginning of the day to give it a boost and help me stay focused on the most important things. All of the conference talks are archived, and I decided to start listening to one talk every morning as I got ready for the day.

This has made a huge difference in my spiritual well-being. It hasn't replaced my daily scripture study but it's been a way for me to start the day off building my faith and thinking about my Savior, Jesus Christ, without having to find a quiet place to read my scriptures (which is pretty much impossible in the crazy chaos of the morning). Instead, I can just pull one up on my phone, put in my headphones, and listen while I'm making lunches or cleaning up the house or doing my hair. It was one of those habits that slid into my normal routine so easily that it was like it was meant to be there. (Two of the talks I've returned to the most from last conference have been Yielding Our Hearts to God by Neill F. Marriott and Faith is Not By Chance, but by Choice by Neil L. Andersen.)

Going on Weekly Dates
This has been something Mike and I have tried to do our whole married lives, but once we added children to the mix, it became much more difficult. Finding a babysitter stressed me out and often,  it felt easier to just stay home than try to coordinate all of the logistics to make an evening out happen. Plus, I harbored a little resentment because, when we did go out, I felt like I was the one who did the bulk of the planning, and it seemed like something we should both be invested in.

Then, early in the year, my sister-in-law, Sonja, mentioned that she and her husband were trying really hard to go on weekly dates. They traded off the planning every other month, and that sounded like a pretty awesome idea to me. I sold the idea to Mike as a competition (we would each take a month and keep track of the dates and whoever ended up planning the most dates would be the winner), but within just a couple of months, we stopped talking about the competition aspect of it. We were just having fun spending quality time together. Since we trade back and forth, I actually enjoy when it's my turn to do the planning because I get to do things that are fun for me, and when it's Mike's month, I relish not planning anything while knowing the dates will still happen.

Doing it this way has also helped us branch out from the standard "go out for dinner" or "stay home and watch a movie" dates we were used to. In the past year, we've gone to an art exhibit, been on a couple of hikes, gone to concerts and plays, and even done a room escape mystery.

Also, over the last nine months, we've discovered that we love middle-of-the-week, middle-of-the-day dates. They feel so indulgent.

Making lunches for the boys
A few months ago, Janssen mentioned that she was packing lunches for both of her older girls, even though only one of them is in school (an idea she got from Miranda). When I read her post, I had one of those lightning bolt moments Gretchen Rubin talks about. What a genius idea, and why had I not been doing such a thing all along? I was making a lunch for Aaron every morning anyway so it wouldn't be that difficult to just pack lunches for Maxwell and Bradley at the same time.

I started that very day, and I haven't looked back. It was one of those habits that fit our lifestyle and our schedule so perfectly that it took virtually no effort on my part to adopt.

And it has transformed my life.

I know, that sounds so dramatic, but I promise you I don't make such a statement lightly. Think about it. What is usually one of the worst times of the day? Lunchtime, right? (The only time of day that could possibly compete with it is the 4:30pm witching hour.) My kids tend to go a little psycho around 11:30am, which tends to make me go a little psycho. But by making the lunches in the morning, when things are relatively calm (and I'm just listening to my conference talk), I've eliminated the stress and craziness of that time of day entirely.

And if we ever decide to go to the park or a friend's house, I can just grab the lunches on our way out the door.

I'm telling you, transformative.

 
Learning to knit
Early last spring, a sweet older lady in our neighborhood taught me how to knit. It had been something I'd wanted to learn how to do for a long time. I started with a dish cloth (isn't that what you always start with?). Then I moved onto a pillow. And right now, I'm halfway through making a vest for Bradley (I'm using small needles, so it's taking me a long time.)

Everything about knitting is calming and relaxing to me (well, except for trying to decode the pattern, but luckily, my teacher hasn't abandoned me). I love the feeling of the soft yarn sliding through my fingers, the methodical click of the needles, and watching the finished product magically grow beneath my hands. It's the perfect thing to do while listening to an audiobook or watching a movie or just sitting tucked up on the couch watching the falling snow. I'm constantly planning out future projects, all while continuing to enjoy the project I'm currently working on.

Plus, learning to knit was one of my actual goals for 2015, and it felt so good to be able to check it off after wanting to learn for so long. I thought I would have to take a class or find some tutorials on the internet, but instead I formed a wonderful friendship with someone in our neighborhood, and that has had its own blessings.

Poetry Snack Time
When I first heard about "poetry tea time" on the Read-Aloud Revival, I decided to try it with my kids, just for fun. The idea is that you combine reading poetry with eating, and that just sounded like a winner combination to me. However, these types of things are often hard for me to stick with simply because, since it's not something we do every day, it can be tricky to know when to fit it in.

But again, as with everything I mentioned above, this tradition took hold with virtually no prodding from me. My kids immediately fell in love with it and look forward to it every time. Over the summer, we did it once a week. Now we do it about once a month (or every other week if we're lucky). I've tried not to force it into our schedule because it's meant to be fun, not essential.

We've tweaked a few things since we started, and I keep meaning to write a full post about it. Hopefully soon.

And that's it. I'd love to know what things YOU started doing in 2015 (big or small!) that changed your life for the better.

2015 Reading: Second Half

I had a goal to read 65 books this year. When I recapped the first half of the year, I was a little worried because I was only up to 30. But between taking a three-week blogging break and reading some quick reads (shhhh), I managed to read 38 books during the second half of the year, which brought my total up to 68. Maybe 2016 will finally be the year when I break the 70 mark.

Here's what I read from July-December. (Book titles are linked to my full reviews.)

1. Henry and the Clubhouse by Beverly Cleary, 8/10 (readaloud)
Ramona is in fine form, and Henry takes it all in stride (except for the part when she locks him up in his own clubhouse--then he kind of loses it).

2. Ramona and Her Father by Beverly Cleary, 8/10 (readaloud)
A little more serious than some of the other Ramona books. Having your dad lose his job will do that to a story.

3. It's All Too Much: An Easy Plan For Living a Richer Life With Less Stuff by Peter Walsh, 7/10 (audio)
I appreciated that he treated stuff as stuff rather than faithful companions, but his actual outline for purging got a little repetitive and tedious.

4. As You Wish: Inconceivable Tales From the Making of The Princess Bride by Cary Ewles, 9/10 (audio)
This book totally transformed my attitude towards The Princess Bride from indifferent, maybe even a little cool, to devoted fan. Also, the audio version is a must.

5. Conversations With a Moonflower by Christine T. Hall, 5/10
The metaphor was a little overdone in this short book, but it made us plant a moonflower in our backyard and the flowers really do open up extremely quickly.

6. Design Mom: How to Live With Kids: A Room-By-Room Guide by Gabrielle Stanley Blair, 8/10
A design book about living with kids that makes you think the author must have actually lived with kids (she does, in fact, have six of her own).

7. The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry by Gabrielle Zevin, 8/10
A book about books and the unpredictability of life. Told in sparse but mesmerizing language.

8. Where the Mountain Meets the Moon by Grace Lin, 8/10 (audio)
A poignant story that surprised me in a dozen delightful ways.

9. Just So Stories by Rudyard Kipling, 5/10 (readaloud)
My kids enjoyed this book far more than I did.

10. Necessary Lies by Diane Chamberlain, 8/10
If you're looking for a good book club book, pick this one.

11. Pippi Longstocking by Astrid Lindgren, 8/10 (readaloud)
Pippi gave us plenty to laugh about. She's one of a kind.

12. Emily's Quest by L.M. Montgomery, 8/10
My favorite of the trilogy, and it has a good nail-biting scene at the end.

13. Fantastic Mr. Fox by Roald Dahl, 7/10 (readaloud)
My kids are still singing the song about Boggis and Bunce and Bean.

14. Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel, 7/10
I liked it, but I think I'd be praising it a lot more if I actually enjoyed post-apocalyptic fiction.

15. The Story of the World: Early Modern Times by Susan Wise Bauer, 7/10 (readaloud)
Perhaps the most challenging book I read to my kids this year, but so rewarding. (And you have to check out our timeline . . . that's my favorite part!)

16. All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr, 8/10 (audio)
Really loved the way this story was told--with the events of the past eventually colliding with the present. I like happy endings though.

17. Believing Christ by Stephen E. Robinson, 8/10
The parable of the bicycle, which has made this book so well-known and loved, was not worth reading this book for. Other parts, however, were.

18. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone by J.K. Rowling, 10/10 (readaloud)
What can I say? Harry Potter is casting his spell on a new generation, and my kids are included.

19. Primates of Park Avenue by Wednesday Martin, 5/10
I started out being completely fascinated by this book, but by the end, I was completely disgusted. Two thumbs down.

20. The Secret Keeper by Kate Morton, 9/10 (audio)
This book has one of the best twists I've ever read.

21. Mister Pip by Lloyd Jones, 3/10
In spite of a good 100-page run in the middle, the beginning was too confusing and the ending was too horrific for me.

22. The Wolves of Willoughby Chase by Joan Aiken, 8/10 (readaloud)
My kids love a despicable villain, and Miss Slighcarp is one of the best (i.e., worst).

23. Morality For Beautiful Girls by Alexander McCall Smith, 6/10 (audio)
Mma Makutsi gets the gold star for this book. She basically saves two businesses and then solves a mystery in her downtime.

24. The Little Leftover Witch by Florence Laughlin, 6/10 (readaloud)
Cute story, but I'll probably have forgotten most of it by next Halloween.

25. The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman, 8/10
There are things I could complain about (and I do in my full review), but overall I loved this creative spin on The Jungle Book.

26. The Unrest Cure and Other Stories by Saki, 8/10
I searched (and searched) (and searched) for a short stories collection that I would like and finally struck gold. Witty, with a touch of the morbid.

27. Honey For a Child's Heart: The Imaginative Use of Books in Family Life by Gladys Hunt, 8/10
The book lists that make up the second half of this book are treasures. (Also, sometimes I get overwhelmed by all of the good books I haven't read yet, and this was one of those times.)

28. Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End by Atul Gawande, 10/10 (audio)
Probably the book I talked about and recommended the most during 2015.

29. Dominic by William Steig, 7/10 (readaloud)
Dominic's adventurous spirit and positive attitude are contagious.

30. Little Men by Louisa May Alcott, 10/10 (audio)
If you think you can't find parenting advice in fiction, read this book.

31. Sideways Stories From Wayside School by Louis Sachar, 8/10
I read this book because Aaron was reading it, and I enjoyed it just as much as he did.

32. Santa Maybe by Aubrey Mace, 6/10
I couldn't get a single new fluffy Christmas book from the library, so I reread this one from a few years ago. Although still entertaining, it didn't hold up very well to a second reading.

33. The Sound of Paper by Julia Cameron, 4/10
Feeling really sad that I wasted so much of my year on this book. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't what I was hoping for either.

34. My Life in France by Julia Child, 8/10 (audio)
I think I would have been totally intimidated by Julia Child in real life, but I sure loved reading her memoir.

35. Farmer Boy by Laura Ingalls Wilder, 10/10 (readaloud)
Contented sigh. I love this book.

36. The Man Who Changed How Boys and Toys Were Made by Bruce Watson, 7/10
Really fascinating biography about A.C. Gilbert, the man who invented the Erector set. (Full review coming soon.)

37. The Family Under the Bridge by Natalie Savage Carlson, 8/10 (readaloud)
Perfect read for this time of year. (Full review coming soon.)

38. Wayside School is Falling Down by Louis Sachar, 8/10
I wasn't really planning on reading another Wayside book, but Aaron told me I had to.  And I'm glad I listened to him. (Full review coming soon.)

It has been such a great year of reading for me, and I hope you can say the same. Have you read any of these books? Tell me what you thought about them!

Reading Goals: I Did It!

I just thought about how sad it would be if I sat down to write this post and realized that I'd inadvertently forgotten one of my goals. I guess there would still be a few more days before the end of 2015 to try to cram it in, but I'm not a fast reader, so I'd probably just have to admit defeat. Luckily, I don't think that happened. I guess I'll see as I write up this report (book titles linked to full reviews).

1. Read a past Newbery honor and a past Newbery winner
I loved this goal. It helped me consider anew books from several (or many) years ago instead of focusing on just all the up and coming books. There are so many truly fantastic books that have already been published that even if all the publishing houses closed their doors for 2016, there would still be more good books than I could possibly read in my lifetime. However (and thankfully), I don't think that's going to happen, and my one regret about this goal is that because of it, I didn't really pay much attention to the current middle grade novels. Now the Newbery is going to be announced next month, and I don't even have a book to cheer for. Next year, I'm going to try to strike more of a balance between past and current.

April 2015: Ginger Pye by Eleanor Estes (Newbery medal 1952)
July 2015: Ramona and Her Father by Beverly Cleary (Newbery honor 1978)
July 2015: Where the Mountain Meets the Moon by Grace Lin (Newbery honor 2010)
October 2015: The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman (Newbery medal 2009)
December 2015: The Family Under the Bridge by Natalie Savage Carlson (Newbery Honor 1959)

2. Read two classics by female authors
This was one of my favorite goals to accomplish this year for two reasons: I felt a major sense of accomplishment when I finished Middlemarch (April 2015) by George Eliot (a new-to-me author), and I discovered a new favorite book when I read Little Men (November 2015) by Louisa May Alcott (a new book by an author I'd read before). In fact, I loved Little Men so much that I'm trying to figure out a way to incorporate more of Louisa May Alcott's work into my goals for 2016.

3. Read a book I put on my to-read list in 2010
I made this same type of goal last year, and it's a great one because it makes me look with new eyes at all those books that have been sitting, neglected and overlooked, on my to-read shelf for five years. I read The Education of Little Tree (May 2015) by Forrest Carter (which I added in July 2010) and The Wolves of Willoughby Chase (October 2015) by Joan Aiken (which I added in March 2010). Next year, I'll be tackling a book or two from the books I shelved in 2011.

4. Read a children's classic
I read Just So Stories (August 2015) by Rudyard Kipling to fulfill this goal, then realized it might have been a better choice for my short stories goal. I also realized that defining a children's classic is a bit arbitrary. How does something become a children's classic? Does it have to be a certain age or read an estimated number of times or have several editions in print? In other words, this goal was more vague than I was planning on. I think I could also count The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (March 2015) by L. Frank Baum and The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe (February 2015) by C.S. Lewis as children's classics (although I didn't count them originally because it was my second or third time reading them).

5. Read a book on writing
This goal was kind of a flop. I take full responsibility for choosing the wrong book (AND for deciding to stick with it), but The Sound of Paper (almost all of 2015) by Julia Cameron was not really what I was hoping for when I made this goal in January. I was looking for a book that would give me some tools to become a better writer and some prompts to practice with. This was more of a book of encouragement for writers (and artists in general), but it has prompts so it fooled me for the first one hundred pages.

6. Read a short stories collection
This was the most nail-biting of my goals because I tried so many collections before I landed on a good one. I actually had almost given up hope and decided short stories just weren't for me when I struck gold with The Unrest Cure and Other Stories (November 2015) by Saki. I enjoyed these stories so much. I'm glad I didn't just settle for any short stories collection I could find (I should have followed the same method for a book on writing).

7. Read something of a religious nature
I ended up reading two books for this goal, and I liked both of them: Mere Christianity (June 2015) by C.S. Lewis and Believing Christ (October 2015) by Stephen E. Robinson.

8. Read two more installments in series I've already started
This goal will probably continue to show up on future goal lists because I'm notorious for starting series and then never returning to them . . . although I don't know why because it is so fun going back to much-loved characters. This year, I fell in love all over again with the Penderwick girls in The Penderwicks in Spring (April 2015) by Jeanne Birdsall and cheered for Mma Ramotswe and Mma Makutsi in Morality for Beautiful Girls (September 2015) by Alexander McCall Smith.

9. Read a food memoir
After much deliberation (and not being able to get my first choice), I settled on My Life in France (December 2015) by Julia Child. It was so good! I loved learning about this spunky, determined, talented lady. (And then, because I recently was talking about Garlic and Sapphires by Ruth Reichl and literally felt hungry for her words, I picked up her latest book, My Kitchen Year. I don't think I'll get it finished before the end of the year, but I'm finding it very enjoyable.)

10. Finish a series
This goal has been on the 2013, 2014, and 2015 lists, and it's been very rewarding every time. This year, I finished the Emily trilogy by L.M. Montgomery. It wasn't quite as ambitious as the two series I finished in the previous two years since it only required me to read two books instead of four or five, but I'm still pretty certain it wouldn't have happened this year without that goal, so I'm glad I made it. I thoroughly enjoyed Emily Climbs (March 2015) and Emily's Quest (August 2015), but Emily will never replace Anne for me because Teddy Kent doesn't hold a candle to Gilbert Blythe. And that's the truth.

I have so many reasons why I love making these goals, not the least of which is that they prevent me from basically ever falling into a reading slump. If I ever can't decide what I should read next, I just turn to my year's list of goals, and the options open up. I'll be talking about my 2016 reading goals next week!

Tell me about the books you read this year! Favorite? Most ambitious? Most tedious?

Reading Goals: The Halfway Point

We've passed the halfway point of the year, and so it's time for me to take a minute and report on how my reading goals are going so far this year (and remind myself of what they are . . . oops!).

1. Read a past Newbery honor and a past Newbery winner (partially complete)
In April, the boys and I read Ginger Pye, which won the Newbery Medal in 1952 (we loved it, by the way). I'm still looking for a Newbery Honor to complete the second half of the goal. We are just about to start Ramona and Her Father as our next readaloud. It won a Newbery Honor in 1978, but I haven't decided yet if I'm going to count it for this goal. The whole point of the goal was to branch out and read a Newbery book I hadn't yet considered, and Ramona and Her Father has been on my list for a long time because I'm planning on reading all the Ramona books to my kids. I don't know . . . we'll see how the second half of the year goes. If I get in a pinch, I'll count it.

2. Read two classics by female authors (partially complete)
I added the qualifier that one of the books needed to be by an author I'd read before and the other by an author I hadn't. I still need to read a book for the first half of this goal (and I'm thinking it will be Little Men by Louisa May Alcott), but I'm done with a book by a female author I hadn't read before. I read Middlemarch by George Eliot. I'm patting myself on the back for that one. I may have some catching up to do with these goals, but I think I can safely assume that's the thickest book I'll read this year, and it's done!

3. Read a book I put on my to-read list in 2010 (complete)

I read The Education of Little Tree, which I put on my to-read list on July 20, 2010 (this is one of the great reasons to use Goodreads. For more of my Goodreads tips, click here). I admit, I picked up The Education of Little Tree for the sole purpose of completing this goal, but I ended up really enjoying it. I still have my eye on a few books from my 2010 list (to clarify, these are books I added to my to-read list in 2010, not that were necessarily written that year), so I may exceed this goal.

4. Read a children's classic (not complete)
The boys and I read The Wonderful Wizard of Oz this year, and I consider that a children's classic, but I'd read it before, so I'm not counting it. Even though I made up these goals and can accomplish them however I choose, I'm not a cheater, and my original intent was to read a children's classic I hadn't read before, so that's what I'm sticking to. I'm going to attempt Rudyard Kipling's Just So Stories with the boys. Hopefully it will go over well.

5. Read a book on writing (partially complete)
I've started The Sound of Paper: Starting From Scratch by Julia Cameron, but I'm only about thirty pages into it. It's slow going because at the end of every chapter (and each chapter is only about four pages long), she gives a little writing prompt, and I've been trying to follow most of them. My favorite one so far was the challenge to describe myself as a literary character in third person.

6. Read a short stories collection (not complete)
After I made this goal, my friend, Jen, loaned me a big stack of short stories collections. I've glanced through them, but for the most part they've sat untouched in my nightstand. Even though it shouldn't feel like that big of a commitment, it does. I think I have a fear of getting one or two stories in before realizing that that collection's not for me. I wish I had a collection in mind that I was really excited to read.

7. Read something of a religious nature (complete)
I read Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis. It was a great companion to my daily scripture study, and I'm sad it's over.

8. Read two more installments in series I've already started (partially complete)
I read the fourth installment in the Penderwicks series: The Penderwicks in Spring. It was fantastic--a highlight of the year so far. It's funny though--until I started writing this post, I didn't even realize that I'd partially completed this goal. I guess that just goes to show that there is nothing assignment-like about the Penderwicks for me. Reading about them is pure pleasure (also, it helped that I was already caught up with the series and was just biding my time for the next installment).

9. Read a food memoir (not complete)
I've kind of held off on this one on purpose because I know how much I love food books in the fall.

10. Finish a series (partially complete)
I'm finishing the Emily trilogy by L.M. Montgomery this year. I'd already read Emily of New Moon (twice) but was having trouble getting to the last two books. Now I've read Emily Climbs, and I'm looking forward to reading Emily's Quest in a few weeks. If you love the Anne books but haven't read these ones about Emily, then I highly recommend them.

So it looks like I've read six of the fourteen books I need to complete these goals. That's not great, but I'm not terribly behind either, so I think I can manage it. If you have any great recommendations for books I should read to complete these goals, I'd love to hear them! How are your 2015 goals coming along?

Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis

One of my reading goals for 2015 is to "read something of a religious nature." There were so many books I could have read for this goal, but I ended up not even considering most of my options but settled almost immediately on this book, which I've wanted to read for many years.

C.S. Lewis has always been a favorite of mine, and not just because he wrote The Chronicles of Narnia. I like him because he almost sounds like he could have been a member of my faith, but he wasn't. His ideas about God's grand plan for each of His children resonates deep within me as something that's true and echoes the foundational doctrines of my church.

I also like him because he has a very similar style to Elder Neal A. Maxwell, one of my favorite Apostles who passed away in 2004. Both of them knew exactly how to turn a phrase for maximum impact and also came up with some deeply clarifying analogies.

Before beginning this book, I didn't realize that it is actually more of a transcribed talk than a book. C.S. Lewis gave it over the air in the 1940's and changed very little of it when it was published in this format. Consequently, it has a very conversational and casual tone to it. He addresses the reader (or, when he gave it, listener) frequently, and it makes what he says feel very personal and applicable.

This book addresses the related questions, "What does it mean to be a Christian?" and "What does a Christian look like?" It doesn't focus on any particular religion but instead discusses Christianity in a very broad, non-denominational way. It is for anyone who either identifies himself as a Christian (and as a Mormon, I do) or is curious about what goes into being a Christian.

I'm going to do something I don't normally do in reviews and just hand out a few of my very favorite quotes from the book. I hope you'll indulge me. These are the one that made me stop and think. These are the ones I especially don't want to forget.

"Reality, in fact, is usually something you could not have guessed. That is one of the reasons I believe Christianity. It is a religion you could not have guessed. If it offered us just the kind of universe we had always expected, I should feel we were making it up. But, in fact, it is not the sort of thing anyone would have made up. It has just that queer twist about it that real things have."

"Enemy-occupied territory--that is what this world is."

"I am trying here to prevent anyone saying the really foolish thing that people often say about Him: 'I'm ready to accept Jesus as a great moral teacher, but I don't accept His claim to be God.' That is the one thing we must not say. A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher. He would either be a lunatic--on the level with the man who says he is a poached egg--or else  he would be the Devil of Hell. You must make your choice. Either this man was, and is, the Son of God: or else a madman or something worse . . . But let us not come with any patronising nonsense about His being a great human teacher. He has not left that open to us. He did not intend to."

"They are told they ought to love God. They cannot find any such feeling in themselves. What are they to do? The answer is the same as before. Act as if you did. Do not sit trying to manufacture feelings. Ask yourself, 'If I were sure that I loved God, what would I do?' When you have found the answer, go and do it."

"And that is precisely what Christianity is about. This world is a great sculptor's shop. We are the statues and there is a rumour going round the shop that some of us are some day going to come to life."

"When you come to knowing God, the initiative lies on His side. If He does not show Himself, nothing you can do will enable you to find Him. And, in fact, He shows much more of Himself to some people than to others--not because He has favorites, but because it is impossible for Him to show Himself to a man whose whole mind and character are in the wrong condition. Just as sunlight, though it has no favorites, cannot be reflected in a dusty mirror as a clean one."

"I find I must borrow yet another parable from George MaDonald. Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and son on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of--throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself."

Sorry. Very quote-heavy, I know. Just be grateful I didn't quote more because there is actually very little in the book that isn't quote-worthy.

I loved this book. It deepened and strengthened my faith. It helped me look at some of my doubts and struggles in a new, illuminating light. It buoyed me up and made me grateful for the foundation of my religion.

My search for knowledge is far from over, and as I continue to read and study and pray, I am comforted by this thought from Lewis: "When you have reached your own room, be kind to those who have chosen different doors and to those who are still in the hall." I think in many ways I am still one of the ones in the hall. There are many things I am uncertain about, and I have many unanswered questions. But I have the faith to keep moving forward, exploring rooms one by one, with the bright hope that one day my faith will be secure and unshaking.

In the meantime, I will do my best to live the life of a Christian and follow the example of my dear Savior.

The Education of Little Tree by Forrest Carter

When I picked up this book, I knew nothing of the controversy surrounding it. I originally put it on my to-read list clear back in 2010 (so reading it fulfills one of my reading goals for the year) because someone had recommended it as a good read for book club. It has yet to be chosen as our selection for the month, although it was discussed once again as a possibility for May (but we went with The Crossover instead).

But controversy aside, I had some misconceptions myself about the book--mainly that it was a middle grade novel. It is not. I don't know if I thought that because the main character is a young boy or if someone actually misrepresented it as a children's novel, but I repeat: it is not. I'll get into the reasons why in a minute.

The story begins when Little Tree is five years old and his fate is being decided by his relatives after his mother's death. It is written in an autobiographical style (and I guess originally it was falsely promoted as the actual autobiography of Forrest Carter), but it's mostly, if not all, fictional.

Little Tree is raised by his Cherokee Granma and Granpa. They live a quiet, but full, life in the mountains, and Little Tree soon grows to love everything about them. His Granpa is in the whiskey-making trade, and Little Tree soon learns all the ins and outs of it, including what to do if someone comes snooping around looking for the still. Little Tree loves his life on the mountain. He loves playing with the hound dogs and watching the sun rise and visiting with Willow John and Mr. Wine. At five years old, he does his best to help out and keep up with his Granpa. The two of them make quite a pair, sending off the hound dogs on a fox hunt just for the fun of it or spending the night in the open air on the mountain or writing off religion as something not for them.

I think if I'd read up on Forrest Carter (a pseudonym for Asa Earl Carter) before reading the book, I would have been so turned off by his shady activities and duplicitous nature that I wouldn't have read it. And that would have been kind of sad because I actually quite enjoyed it. And even though Carter was charged with being a white supremacist, I can honestly say that I didn't pick up any hint of that while reading, not at all.

So instead of talking about Carter's deplorable choices, let's revisit my false assumption that this was a children's book. Think of it along the same lines as To Kill a Mockingbird. Even though Scout is the main character, it's written for a more mature audience, and I think the same is true for The Education of Little Tree. There's a fair bit of swearing (Granpa has a salty tongue, and Little Tree adopts it), as well as some rather startling, if brief, descriptions of the more sensitive facts of life. I just think overall it would be better suited for teenagers, but I'd love to have you weigh in with your opinion.

Little Tree's voice was both quaint and perceptive, and I was completely taken with it. One of my favorite chapters was when he told about letting the hounds loose to trail a fox. Everyone (including the fox) seemed to be in on the fact that it was all a game, but that didn't lessen the excitement of it. The hounds started out in a wide circle, finding the fox's scent and going after it. Granpa and Little Tree watched from the sidelines. The chase went on for most of the night while the fox, sneaky and sly, evaded them. I felt like I was sitting on the mountain with Granpa and Little Tree watching it all unfold and laughing right along with them when Bess and Rippitt fell for the fox's trick and lost his scent on the other side of the creek. It was truly delightful.

I also loved Granpa's character: his distrust of politicians, his opinions on the validity of his business, and most of all, his little bits of wisdom, a sampling of which is found below:

• "You can't cheat without making unnecessary trouble for yourself." 
• "You could make bad judgments about any trade, giving it a bad name, if you judged by the worst that was carrying on the trade." 
• [After Rippitt died and Little Tree confided that he felt so bad and empty about it]: "Granpa said he knew how I felt, for he was feeling the same way. But Granpa said everything you lost which you had loved give you that feeling. He said the only way round it was not to love anything, which was worse because you would feel empty all the time."
• "If ye don't know the past, then ye will not have a future. If ye don't know where your people have been, then ye won't know where your people are going." 
• "If a hound or anybody else has got no feeling of worth, then it's a bad thing."

And to nearly all of these statements, Little Tree would tack on his, "Which is right" or, "Which proves out as reasonable" on the end of them.  

In spite of Forrest Carter's failings, I really think he wrote an exceptionally poignant and emotional novel. Like I said at the beginning, as I was reading, I didn't pick up on any racial prejudice or injustice (there are characters within the story who are unkind or prejudiced but they are represented as such). Maybe I'm just a naive or unperceptive reader, but what I found instead was a story with heart and wisdom and depth. If I started judging all books by the conduct of the authors who wrote them, I guess I wouldn't get to read very many books.

Middlemarch by George Eliot

I had no intention of reading Middlemarch.

Several years ago, I remember Mike telling me that I should read it. Apparently, it was a casual acquaintance's favorite book. That wasn't much of a trusted recommendation, but I briefly considered it. However, when I saw the length, I tucked it away indefinitely. I love to read, but long books are still daunting because I know I'm going to give up weeks, maybe even months, when I could be reading something else.

So really, I had no plans to read Middlemarch.

But then at the beginning of the year, I made the goal to "Read two classics by female authors." I was thinking of Edith Wharton or Virginia Woolf or Anne Brontë, but then one of my friends reminded me that George Eliot was actually a pen name for Mary Ann Evans. This same friend also said that if I read Middlemarch, then she would read it too, and then we could discuss it afterwards.

I just can't resist checking off a goal and having someone to discuss a book with. So without quite realizing what I was getting myself into, I checked out the audio from the library.

That was three and a half months ago. This book consumed nearly a third of this year. And was it worth it? Well, read on and decide for yourself.

The story is set in Middlemarch, a fictional town in central England. Although the cast of characters is quite large, the plot mainly focuses on two people: Dorothea Brooke and Tertius Lydgate. Interestingly, the two of them actually have very little interaction with each other until the end of the novel. Dorothea is intelligent, pious, and even a little self-righteous (provoking Will Ladislaw to say at one point, "I believe that you have some false belief in the virtues of misery"). All she really wants is to make a little bit of a difference in the world. So when Reverend Edward Casaubon (who is something like 20 years older than she is) asks her to marry him, she accepts (even though at the age of 18, she is not even close to desperate, plus she already has another offer from the dashing Sir James Chettam). Her younger sister, Celia, can't imagine what would drive her to such a decision, which leads to one of my favorite conversations in the whole book (between Celia and Mrs. Cadwallader):

"I am so sorry for Dorothea."
"Sorry! It is her doing, I suppose."
"Yes. She says Mr. Casaubon has a great soul."
"With all my heart!"
"Oh, Mrs. Cadwallader. I don't think it can be nice to marry a man with a great soul."
"Well, my dear, take warning. You know the look of one now. When the next comes and wants to marry you, don't you accept him."
"I'm sure I never should."
"No. One such in a family is enough."

Anyway, true to Celia's fears, that marriage proves to be a disaster from the start, but meanwhile, Dr. Tertius Lydgate moves to Middlemarch. He is a young doctor and just getting started in his practice. He is similar to Dorothea in that he has high ambitions for his life, feels a strong loyalty to his profession, and intends to improve the world, even if it means rocking Middlemarch's hierarchy and politics just a little bit.

A wrench is thrown into his plans, however, when local beauty, Rosamond Vincy, falls for him. Before long, they are married, but Rosamond is unprepared to accept the meager salary of a young, struggling doctor, and their marriage is soon on shaky ground as well.

That little summary introduces you to the main characters, but it does not even begin to scratch the surface of what this novel is about (nor does it introduce you to my favorite couple, Fred Vincy and Mary Garth). I don't think it's possible for me to condense an epic novel into a few paragraphs, and I don't think that's what you came here for anyway.

If you've read Middlemarch, first of all, congrats, and second, let's go out for lunch and discuss it.

And if you haven't read it, well then, you're probably wondering if you should read it. Is this a classic that should be required reading for every single person on the planet?

Hmmmm . . . I'm going to say, no.

That's not because I didn't like it, and it's not because I didn't find a great deal of value in it. It's just that it took three and a half months to finish, and I'm not sure it was worth the sacrifice. A few weeks ago, I was at book club with the same friend who had agreed to read it with me. I told her I was on disc 18, and "it was finally picking up." And then I thought, Did you hear what you just said?! You've listened to over twenty hours, and it's just now becoming interesting?! There's something wrong with that.

That assessment wasn't entirely true. I hadn't found the whole thing up to that point uninteresting, but enough that it was feeling like a bit of a slog to get through. The question that I kept asking myself was, "If the ending is amazing, will the rest of the book have been worth it?"

George Eliot was a contemporary to Charles Dickens (the first installment of Middlemarch was published just a year after his death), and their novels follow similar structures. I've learned from the Dickens' novels I've read that the set up is worth it. You invest the time to get to know the characters and their secrets and then the ending brings everything together in a miraculous sort of way.

So that's what I was expecting to have happen in Middlemarch. And to a certain extent, that's what did happen. It was easy for me to finish the book. The tension between Rosamond and Lydgate was palpable. Their arguments were so real, I felt like someone could lift them straight out of the story and drop them into a modern novel and no one would guess they were written in 1870. And then there were Bulstrode's secrets (the most Dickenish part of the story for sure--you can't convince me Raffles wasn't actually one of Dickens' creations). And of course, how could I not love Will Ladislaw's tumultuous, but yet tender, passion?

So I'm torn. It is brilliant. I can see why it is on so many people's favorite lists, but . . . I don't think it will go on mine. I loved the characters and the commentary on marriage (so insightful!). And I found many of the passages to be worthy of being written down and remembered. But the middle was unforgivably tedious for me, and I'm just realizing that if I ever wanted to reread this book (and I believe if a book is a "favorite,"then of course you will want to reread it), I'd have to go through that again, and I don't think it would be worth it. One time, yes. A second time, probably not.

My experience reminded me of something that was said about Ladislaw's and Dorothea's relationship: "But what we call our despair is often only the painful eagerness of unfed hope." Sometimes listening to this book felt like despair (usually when I was trying to listen to it when my kids were awake--always a big mistake), but really that despair was only the "painful eagerness of unfed hope." I hoped it was going to get interesting. I hoped the ending was going to be amazing. I hoped things were going to work out for the best for all of the characters.

And, for the most part, all my hopes were fulfilled.

Tell me: Have you read Middlemarch? Are you glad you did? Who is your favorite character(s)? And what was the hardest part for you to get through (mine was when Mr. Brooke was running for a position in Parliament)?

KidPages: How to Catch a Mouse by Philippa Leathers

A couple of years ago, I reviewed Philippa Leathers' The Black Rabbit. At the time, it was her only book, and I was so hopeful that it wouldn't be too long before she came out with another one.

Well, I'm thrilled to tell you that day has arrived (or almost--release date: April 28th).

This one stars a little orange cat named Clemmie (cute name, don't you think?). Clemmie is an excellent mouse catcher . . . she thinks. To date, she's never actually caught a mouse, nor, erm, ever actually seen one either. But she knows exactly what to look for: a whiskery, pointy nose, two round ears, and a long pink tail. And she's seen nothing that meets that description. It must be because all mice are afraid of her.

What she doesn't know is that the mouse (because, in fact, there is one) has been taking lessons right along with her and has found a way to disguise his incriminating body parts. But the disguise gives him a false sense of security, and Clemmie soon learns that two can play at this game . . .

As with The Black Rabbit, the reader is immediately armed with some important information that the main character doesn't know. (In The Black Rabbit, it was that the "rabbit" he was so afraid of was actually his shadow; in this one, it is that the mouse happens to be much closer than Clemmie thinks.) My kids loved finding and pointing to the mouse each time. They tried to get Clemmie to see her error, but she was too busy chasing down things that met the mouse description but that weren't actually mice.

The illustrations are charming. My favorite one shows Clemmie studying a book about mice. Unbeknownst to her, the mouse is standing right behind her, taking careful note of everything as well. Each picture is a careful balance between the sneaky and the obvious. It's one of those books that makes a great readaloud (which you would think all picture books should be, but trust me, they're not). And although it was great fun to read it to just my kids, it would also be an excellent choice for a large group story time.

I have to admit that I'm getting a little sick of picture books that end with two enemies becoming friends (the wolf and the lamb, the fox and the rabbit, the shark and the fish, etc.). Don't get me wrong, that's a great premise, but sometimes it's entirely unbelievable. So I love it that this book ends with no such resolution. It leaves you with a bit of a cliffhanger: the chase is still on, their relationship is still fraught with distrust, and you know there are still many exciting times ahead.

Philippa Leathers has created another winner, which leads me to say what I said in my review two years ago: "I'm so hopeful that she'll write and illustrate many, many more."

Many thanks to Candlewick Press for a hardback copy of this book to review. All opinions are my own.

The Penderwicks in Spring by Jeanne Birdsall

As soon as I cracked the cover and read the familiar names of Rosalind, Skye, Jane, and Batty, I sighed with contentment. It was like coming home. I dearly, dearly love the Penderwicks.

In my opinion, these books just keep getting better and better. While I've always loved the characters and the writing, I feel like the plots have improved with each one. This one dug deep, tugged hard at the heartstrings, and resolved some long buried issues.

Several years have passed since the vacation in Maine with Aunt Claire. Rosalind is a freshman in college, and Skye and Jane are teenagers. Batty is 10-almost-11, Ben is in the second grade, and Lydia (yes, a brand-new Penderwick!) is almost two. The Geiger boys across the street are both grown up too (Nick is in the military and Tommy is in college), and Jeffrey (still an honorary Penderwick) lives in Boston with his father.

With so many characters mulling about (and really, that Penderwick house always seems to be filled to bursting), it would have been so easy for this story to be chaotic or disorganized, but Jeanne Birdsall gave it all to Batty (keeping this series firmly fixed at the middle grade level). It felt similar to the other books in that we still get glimpses into the lives of the other family members (and happily, their voices are as distinct as ever), but the story belongs to Batty.

Her butterfly wings have long-since been abandoned, but she is still the same (shy, musical, and devoted to her family). When Mrs. Grunfeld (her music teacher at school) discovers her rare singing voice, Batty has big ideas of planning a Grand Eleventh Birthday Concert to surprise her family. So she sets out to make money in order to pay for her own voice lessons.

But things don't go as planned (there would be no story if they did). The only job she can find is walking the Ayvazian's obese dachshund, and she was hoping to avoid any pet-watching since she still feels guilt over Hound's death six months earlier. There's also trouble with the boyfriend Rosalind brings home from school, not to mention her mounting pile of unfinished book reports. But the real problem arises when Batty accidentally eavesdrops on a private conversation between Jeffrey and Skye (Jeffrey is madly in love with Skye, while Skye wants their relationship to stay rooted in loyal friendship). Skye, as insensitive as ever, says something that is indescribably cruel and hurtful. Granted, it wasn't meant for Batty's ears, but she heard it anyway, and it sends her into a deep chasm of despair and guilt.

At first, I didn't know how I felt about the leap in time, but I ended up loving it. It was so fun to see how Rosalind, Skye, and Jane were still very much themselves even while being on the brink of adulthood. Rosalind is still the practical, responsible one (even though I was very disappointed in her choice of boyfriends--I think her neglect of Batty was one of the things that hurt the most about this story, even though it was eventually resolved); Skye is still brusque and rude and not the least bit interested in love (I loved it when Jeffrey gave her a birthday present, and she said, "That's a small box. If it's jewelry, I'll kill you"); Jane, as you might expect, is constantly entertaining a houseful of boys, but she is interested in them more for the sake of research for her latest novel and less because she has any real interest in them. It was delightful to remember them as little girls but get to see what they're like in the next stage of life, a rare occurrence, especially in a book that doesn't grow with them (like Anne of Green Gables or Betsy-Tacy).

But still, there are those missing years, and I long to know all that happened during them. It's obvious that we missed out on some good times. And nowhere did I feel this hole more acutely than with Nick and Tommy Geiger. These rambunctious brothers were a part of The Penderwicks on Gardam Street but neither of the other two books (which take place during summer vacation). When this novel opens up, the Penderwicks are anxiously awaiting Nick's return home from being overseas. Even though he's only home for a brief three-week leave, he plays a big role in this story, and I kind of fell in love with his cocky-but-nevertheless-sincere self. I wish there were more stories with him and Tommy.

The emotional depth in this book is amazing. I felt Batty's pain and loneliness so acutely, especially when the ones that should have been there for her were not (Rosalind. Jeffrey. I'm looking at you). One of the most painfully realistic scenes was when Batty goes to Mrs. Grunfeld's office for a voice lesson. She can't sing because one, she can't stop crying but two, because her worry and anxiety have caused her to tighten up so much that no sound will come out. Mrs. Grunfeld is comforting but practical. She says they don't need to sing that day; they can just go over the rhythm of breathing. She begins the lesson, "but Batty had started to cry again. Mrs. Grunfeld wrapped her arms around the sobbing girl and kept hold of her for a long time." I remember being an eleven-year-old girl and not being able to stop the flow of tears when I felt overwhelmed by something (heck, I know what it's like to be a 30-year-old girl who can't stop crying), so that scene felt so real to me.

My one complaint is that, as with the other books, sometimes the drama just went a little over the top. For example, it's obvious from the get-go that Rosalind's boyfriend, Oliver, is a real loser, so the scene where he brings in these ridiculous bouquets for Skye and Rosalind and then yanks off Lydia's dandelion crown to replace it with roses (and she, in self defense smashes quesadillas all over him) seemed like a little too much. I have a feeling kids will love that scene though.

In an era where authors are cranking out one or two, sometimes even three, books a year, I can't tell you how impressed I am with Jeanne Birdsall's slow writing place. She takes her time to live with the story, and as a result, all of her books are tightly woven, beautiful little packages. Of course I'm dying for the fifth (and final! sob!) book to be out, but I would rather wait three years and have it match the others in quality than have a sloppy job in my hands right now. (Three years also gives me plenty of time to speculate: will the story take place in winter, the one season we haven't seen the Penderwicks in yet? Or will it be another summer novel since the Penderwicks do summer so very well? Will time elapse again? Will the story focus on Lydia (if that's the case, I have definite mixed feelings--she's not one of the original Penderwicks, after all). Will anything happen between Rosalind and Tommy? Skye and Jeffrey? So many things to anticipate!)

Oh wait, here I am wrapping up this post, and I forgot to mention my very, very favorite scene! Rather than go back and stick it in the middle, I'm just going to tell you about it here at the end (how's that for editing?). I told you about Jeffrey's birthday present to Skye (it was in a small box, but thankfully it wasn't jewelry--Jeffrey knows Skye better than that, even if he is in love with her), but I forgot to tell about Jeffrey's birthday present to Batty. Batty's birthday is a week after Skye's, and by that time, Jeffrey is back in Boston with strict orders from Skye not to come back until he can stop with the ridiculous love talk. So he sends Batty's present in the mail. And it is just so perfect. I won't say what it is because that is not a moment I would want ruined for anything. But just know, you're in for a treat.

If you haven't read these books, I would definitely start with the first one rather than jumping in with number four. And also, if you're wondering about audio vs. written, I don't know which I'd recommend. I listened to the first three, but I read this one, and I found both experiences to be equally pleasant. I wish these books had been around when I was a kid.

Have you read any of the Penderwicks' adventures? Which is your favorite book? Which Penderwick do you most relate to?

A Heart Revealed by Josi S. Kilpack

I took voice lessons for a brief few months when I was 14 or 15. They didn’t last very long, and now one of the only things I remember from them was that my voice teacher was overwhelmingly positive . . . to a fault. She was constantly kind and complimentary, praising me up one side and down another, so you would have thought my self-esteem would have soared under her tutelage. But it didn’t. After just a few weeks, I felt like I couldn’t trust her. I didn’t know which compliments were real and which ones were there because she was afraid to hurt my feelings. I became so grateful for my piano teacher who was formidably honest about everything (including the color of my fingernails). But when she gave me a compliment, I glowed with pleasure because I knew it was the real deal.

I have thought about that contrasting experience many times over the last three years as I’ve written about and reviewed books on this blog. When I’m hesitant to share something I didn’t like, I remember my experience with my two music teachers. I realize that if I only write glowing reviews, they will soon become meaningless because no one will know if I’m giving my true opinion or just gently smoothing over the surface, being careful not to disturb the waters underneath.

You’ve probably guessed from that little introduction that the review I’m about to write is one that would make my piano teacher proud because even though it might not be overwhelmingly positive, it will be honest.

Set in England during the Regency Era, Amber Sterlington has it all: beauty, wealth, and her choice of eligible bachelors. When she enters a room, other people notice . . . including Thomas Richards, who is in London for the Season before returning to his country estate in Yorkshire. Thomas is but the third son of a country lord and knows he doesn’t have a chance of winning Amber’s attention. But still, her obvious arrogance and condescension towards him make him burn with humiliation.

This arrogance affects Amber’s other relationships as well, including those with her mother, sister, and maid. She doesn’t recognize the damage she has done until she unexpectedly begins to lose her hair. As her condition worsens, she is shunned from society, and she realizes she doesn’t have a single friend or family member to turn to for love, comfort and support. After many months, and as her prospects permanently crumble, Amber’s heart softens, and she emerges a much kinder and wiser person.

Because of its focus on a rare health disorder, this is far from your typical Regency romance. I certainly appreciated the author’s boldness in branching out and tackling a difficult subject. However, there were times, many times actually, when I felt like the novel was using Amber’s condition as a crutch. Forming the plot around a unique disease does not instantly make a deep and touching story, and in the end, the originality was not enough to carry the rest of the book through some of its other flaws.

·       For example, the pacing was very slow. This isn't unusual for a Regency romance, but the conversations and details that happened in the meantime were so uninteresting and repetitive that I had a really difficult time making it through to anything that was actually noteworthy. There was very little interaction between Amber and Thomas (and what does happen mostly occurs with a wall between them). When they finally see each other and speak face to face at the end, it made me a little uncomfortable, rather than happy. I guess part of the problem was that I just never liked Amber. At first, she was too stuck up and by the end, she was too humble. It wasn't that I felt like her transition was unbelievable, just that I didn't like either result.

·         It also felt really preachy to me. That is an adjective I strive to avoid in my reviews, but in this case, I can't help myself. From Amber’s condition to messages about inner beauty to even comments about modesty (when Amber walks into the room in a revealing gown, Thomas chastises himself because he knows “he [is] the one in keeping of his own thoughts and ought not to blame her manner of dress for his own weakness”), I just felt like little ideas were being compartmentalized and forced onto me.

The book did generate some strong emotions from me, which I think says something positive for it. I liked Amber’s maid, Suzanne, and appreciated this thought from her, “I . . . believe that there are people in every society who would prefer the heart you have grown, to the beauty you left behind to find it.” (But it would have been more powerful if I hadn’t read almost the same sentiment several more times.)   

On the flip side, I felt a strong dislike for Amber’s family, who, instead of rallying around her, banished her to Yorkshire so they wouldn’t be tainted by her appearance. Her father’s words especially made me so angry: “That you have to endure such a thing is unfortunate indeed, but I should think you would not want your family to suffer along with you. I should think that as a woman of feeling and sound mind you should want to protect us from such derision, not ask that we share it with you.” 

As I've written this review, I've tried to think about how I would have altered it if I happened to personally know the author. Would I have mentioned the things I didn't like? Would I have focused on the things I did like? For sure, such a relationship would have made this review even more difficult to write, and I don't know what I would have done. However, in the end, I think my reaction to it was far simpler than I've made this review out to be. It wasn't so much like vs. dislike but just plain, old boredom. I guess it just wasn't for me.

I received an advance copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.